| How To Make It To A Meeting After You Have The Driving Directions |
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Social anxiety support groups are very hard to get started probably because the moderator has social anxiety, people with SA don't know there's a name for it, or, when they find out, they don't exactly like the idea of a group of people. Maybe it's the fear of being judged negatively if you admit to having SA, the fear of having the worst symptoms in the group, or simply the fear of being in a group setting. (Hopefully that doesn't give you new ideas for things to worry about :)
If you're wanting to come, but afraid, here are some ideas of things you can do to help lower your anxiety enough to make it to a meeting. You can do whatever appeals to you, or if something in the list makes you think of something else that might help, give it a try...you might know what you need.
- Read everything you can stand :) on the SASG website. If nothing else, check out the handout for every meeting.
- Desensitization: during a day there is no SASG meeting try just driving or walking by the UCP Center building and look at it. On a day there is a meeting, go as close as you can before the anxiety is too great, then turn around and go to a comfortable place and take a 2 week break, and determine to try to take even just one step closer the next meeting day.
- Check out Social Anxiety Support BBoard. You can read the posts anonymously without signing up. You will see you're not alone at all.
- If you're up to it, e-mail me (Dan) at the address to the right. I've been suffering from SA since I was 12, including a period of time I refused to go to school because I was so afraid (all of 7th grade). I've had panic attacks in school, been made fun of, and stayed in my house for long stretches, so I know at least somewhat severe SA from my own life, so I'm not going to judge you. If you can e-mail even just to say you're interested, that's all, I can add your address to the mailing list for meeting reminders. If you feel ok saying more, I have (probably) incorrect beliefs about how horribly people'll judge me, so I need to talk to people too :)
- If you have a fast connection, check out videos on SA and by people with SA on YouTube. Some people seem to have been able to post some honest video journals and there are a few documentaries.
- Check out Social Phobia Phunnies. The humor helps to get a little distance from the voice of fear, and some of the comics are really hilarious.
- This isn't a Social Phobics Anonymous group, but this one from the SPA FAQ is relevant: "Q. I am afraid I will be judged or criticized in the Social Phobics Anonymous support group meetings so how can I attend?"
"A. People in the Social Phobics Anonymous support groups understand the fear of being judged or criticised-- because they have had these fears themselves. Consequently, you will find our groups to be exceptionally welcoming and understanding. We who have known the pain of imagined and real criticism tend to be very understanding and patient with fellow Social Anxiety sufferers."
- Also from the SPA FAQ: "Q. Does it work? Will this really help me get over my social anxiety problems?"
"A. Yes! It really can work! This can eventually greatly reduce or even eliminate one's social anxiety problems. I have experienced this myself and I can tell you that starting a support group was one of the most worthwhile things I have ever done.
"And it was easier than I thought it would be! It just took a little patience and a willingness to show up without fail every week (on time) and read quietly to myself when others did not come. Eventually they did and now I have a family of recovering friends. Of course each case is individual and we each have to find the recovery or treatment modality that works best for us personally.
"There is really no mystery here, all that was missing was the Social Anxiety fellowship, working as a community on the 12 step path...
"The result was that we began to experience the joy of being freed from the prison of our social anxiety.
"The end of years of painful social isolation and the wonderful ability to enjoy precious friendships, to end unnecessary separation from relatives, to go to work with dignity and a healthy pride and perhaps to even experience the sacred privilege of an intimate relationship for the first time in years.
"These are just some of the many gifts that can come from putting social anxiety recovery out front where it belongs and giving oneself the gift of a fellowship entirely focused on using the 12 steps to gain release from this sad and bitter syndrome." (The PSASG doesn't use the 12 steps, but they're not bad if you want to take a look at them)
- Check out PostSecret.com, where anonymous secrets on postcards are posted online. Reading through them can have a good effect on you.
- Send an e-mail to someone else suffering from SA. If you do a Google search for "social anxiety pen pal" you get a lot of hits. There are a lot of people with SA who want to have an e-mail pen pal who has SA also. It might help to work with others online for a period of time first.
- Tell someone you trust that you have this group you want to go to. The act of telling someone your intention to make it to a meeting will keep it in your mind and add reasons to go to counter the part of you which tries to stop you.
- Don't give up. You made it to the point where you know the name of the disorder (social anxiety) and checked out a support group's website, which is more than you could have said in the past.
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| E-mail |
| To e-mail, |
| pittsburghSASG@gmail.com |
| You can show up without e-mailing, it's there just for further information if you want it. |
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| Social Anxiety Quote |
| June 6, 2009
"I shot an arrow into the air,
It fell to earth, I knew not where;
For, so swiftly it flew, the sight
Could not follow it in its flight.
I breathed a song into the air,
It fell to earth, I knew not where;
For who has sight so keen and strong,
That it can follow the flight of a song?
Long, long afterward, in an oak
I found the arrow, still unbroke;
and the song, from beginning to end,
I found again in the heart of a friend."
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow in "Random House Treasury of Friendship Poems" |
| previous quotes |
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